SAVANNAH, Ga. (WTOC) – Pastor Ricky Temple from Overcoming by Faith Church told WTOC that regrets are an unavoidable part of life that can serve as valuable teaching tools.
“Regrets are part of life. I don’t think you can ever live without having regrets,” Temple said. “I think you’re going to have seasons when things just aren’t going to work right. And learning how to manage that is important.”
Temple said regrets help people by showing them what not to do in the future.
“I have regrets about money, but those regrets taught me how to manage money,” Temple said. “There’s nothing like needing millions of dollars. Nothing. Nothing like it, honest to God.”
Temple said owing millions of dollars in staff and bills created regrets about hiring decisions and financial management, but those experiences became valuable lessons.
“All those regrets become a library of information. They teach me,” Temple said. “Without them, I wouldn’t be wiser.”
Learning through failure
Temple compared life regrets to academic challenges, saying both involve tests and mistakes that lead to growth.
Temple said he once studied for a college test but opened the exam to discover he had prepared the wrong chapter.
“Big regret for a great lesson. I now pay attention,” Temple said.
Temple said people often criticize themselves when looking back at past decisions or relationships, but that self-reflection is part of the growth process.
“What I really love about my faith is it teaches me that I’m loved even when I’m not perfect,” Temple said. “Even when I’m flawed, even when I don’t get it right.”
Temple said people love their children, employers and employees through seasons of growth, and the same grace should apply to personal mistakes.
“I think it’s great to have those moments. It keeps you humble,” Temple said.
Embracing all seasons
Temple said people sometimes stop emotionally, spiritually or mentally before reaching their potential, but those pauses can be part of healthy growth.
“I think sometimes you just stop caring. And I think that’s healthy because now you learn,” Temple said. “I can get to a point where I’m not okay. And I can get to a point where I’m angry.”
Temple said he sometimes does not want to be a pastor or handle business demands and expenses.
“Sometimes emotionally I do stop. But all those seasons help me,” Temple said. “If we can learn to embrace all the seasons, not just the good ones.”
Temple has a talk called “How Far Will You Go? And How Much Will You Surrender?” that examines how distance and willingness to push forward determine success.
“Some people are not willing to go far enough to get certain things,” Temple said.
Temple said his academic journey taught him about his potential when a professor assigned five books for one class as a freshman.
“I just thought he was kidding. I said, you’re not serious. You have to read them all the way?” Temple said.
Temple said the process of being pushed and challenged helped him learn about his potential and stretch capacity.
“I didn’t think I could stretch that far. But I made it,” Temple said. “And it all took time, patience, and I, over time, finally got to walk across that stage of life.”
The role of pride
Temple said pride can both hold people back and help them advance.
“Some things I just refuse to do because of my pride. You know, I have to comb my hair,” Temple said. “My mother raised me to iron your clothes. So there’s a certain level of pride I have. That’s a good thing.”
Temple said pride becomes negative when people cannot listen or embrace new ideas because they are fixated on one way of thinking.
“I think one of the things in this new generation that’s really tragic sometimes, is I see they’re not allowing the wisdom of the past to be given to them,” Temple said. “And sometimes they view counsel as criticism. And I think that’s unwise.”
Temple cited Patrick Lencioni’s advice that people need to be humble, hungry and smart.
“It’s smart to be able to sit down and say, what do you think about what I just did? What do you think about the way I speak?” Temple said.
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